Ok so it’s been a minute…more like 1,956,960 minutes (3 years and 7 months)…yes I actually did the math smh BUT those minutes have been spent developing and working on my best self…well most of it anyway.  When I started this blog back in 2015 I thought, oh this will be cute…look at me, the mother of four, talking about my exciting life as the truckers wife.  Well life has a way of throwing you lemons instead of apples, prunes instead of oranges and rocks instead of flowers…you get the point.  However, it’s what you do with them that makes the difference and let me just say I didn’t manage what I was thrown very well at all…smh again (not at first anyway).

The saying ‘if it ain’t broke don’t fix it’ can sometimes be the furthest thing from the truth.  From the outside everything seemed to be just fine, nothing seemed to be broken, my marriage seemed to be working, the kids seemed to be doing well, and I seemed to be happy. Boy was I wrong…it was ALL broken and without even realizing it I almost lost it all.  I won’t bore you with the details but let’s just say my marriage tanked, my relationship with my oldest child hit rock bottom and I was basically just existing, going through the day to day motions of life and raising the two kids who were too young to even notice the changes. (I have to say we did work really hard to make sure of that).  At first, I was devastated, didn’t know what to do, where to turn, who to talk to. I had no desire to blog and tell about my life…most of the time I had no clue how I felt, more less than to be trying to tell someone all about it. But God puts people in your life just in time for when you need them. They seem to know exactly what’s going on without you even having to say a word. They can offer words of encouragement, support, and overall care and concern, whether they know it or not.  So once I got over the devastation I went into action!

One thing I’ve learned in all of this is that God will allow certain things to happen for numerous reasons. Sometimes it’s growth, sometimes it’s patience, and other times it’s to get you to see the ‘who and what’ that you need or don’t need in your life.  In all of that muck I found myself…the ME outside of my marriage and my kids, I changed the negative mindset that had been causing me so much pain for so long, I developed a strong sense of confidence in myself that I had never had before and it felt great!  Once that mission was complete, I made it my business to get my Trucker back. I learned that he wasn’t bad for me, he was actually the best thing to ever happen to me, I just didn’t know how to treat it (him or our marriage) because I had never had it before and really didn’t know what it looked or felt like to have someone love you more than themself, to have someone to make decisions that were not only good for him but for the family and most importantly for ME! I started a business, he started his own trucking company (although he was not yet driving under his own authority yet) and I felt renewed, refreshed and BLESSED!

So here we are today, 1,956,960 minutes later and I am happy to announce that I got back all that I thought I lost and more!!  My marriage is back on track and better than ever, our businesses are both growing and doing well, my oldest child and I are developing our once sour relationship, still not the greatest but definitely a work in progress and guess what yall I’M HAPPY!! Now that is not saying that we don’t disagree or argue or have periods of non-speaking moments, but what it does say is we are better communicators now, I listen to hear and not just to respond, he gives me the opportunity to speak my mind instead of toning me out, I say what’s on my mind when it’s relevant and not six months later when something else random happens and I’ve let go of so much baggage that was keeping me from loving properly and being properly loved.  Let’s just say this has been my life as the truckers wife!  I’m excited to be back on track and can’t wait to share all of the things we have been up to just this year alone. Stay tuned!